I was sparked by something I read on Memoirs of a Single Mom about calling the man she is seeing her “boyfriend” at a party, for the first time.
It made me smile because the first time I heard J call me his girlfriend, he actually introduced me as his “girl”.
Funny enough, I love it, he says that at age 47, the term “girlfriend” seems immature.
But I joke, “it makes me sound like your servant.”
And funny enough, I tend to call him my “guy”.
On the girls’ emergency form papers from school that we have to update every year, there was a space to add J as someone they can call in the event of an emergency, mainly because he lives with us and we also live two blocks away from the school. I also added him as someone who can check them out of school and pick them up, especially knowing I am up for jury duty on Monday (gah) which kind of fouls up our schedule.
At any rate, on the form to sign him up for “able to call in an emergency and allowed to pick them up from school when I cannot” priviledges, I was faced with filling in the space that said “what is this person’s relationship to the child?”
I showed it to him and joked, “do you think I should just write in, ‘my mommy’s boyfriend'”?
In the end, I wrote “stepdad”, because that has been the role has has fallen into so graciously, immediately, respectfully and with so much love on both the giving and receiving end.
We may not be married, but as he says, “it’s like we’re married, but we’re not.”