What to call him

I was sparked  by something I read on Memoirs of a Single Mom about calling the man she is seeing her “boyfriend” at a party, for the first time.

It made me smile because the first time I heard J call me his girlfriend, he actually introduced me as his “girl”.

Funny enough, I love it, he says that at age 47, the term “girlfriend” seems immature.

But I joke, “it makes me sound like your servant.”

And funny enough, I tend to call him my “guy”.

On the girls’ emergency form papers from school that we have to update every year, there was a space to add J as someone they can call in the event of an emergency, mainly because he lives with us and we also live two blocks away from the school.  I also added him as someone who can check them out of school and pick them up, especially knowing I am up for jury duty on Monday (gah) which kind of fouls up our schedule.

At any rate, on the form to sign him up for “able to call in an emergency and allowed to pick them up from school when I cannot” priviledges, I was faced with filling in the space that said “what is this person’s relationship to the child?”

I showed it to him and joked, “do you think I should just write in, ‘my mommy’s boyfriend'”?

In the end, I wrote “stepdad”, because that has been the role has has fallen into so graciously, immediately, respectfully and with so much love on both the giving and receiving end.

We may not be married, but as he says, “it’s like we’re married, but we’re not.”

11 responses to this post.

  1. You could put significant other, or common law husband, or room mate/lover that is a good one.


  2. When my man finally makes it into town, I am guessing for us and forms he will just be “friend”….because writing “really, really good friend” or “mom’s man” seems a bit much…


  3. I LOVE him calling you his “girl.” Sounds so romantic. 🙂


  4. Personally I think I will opt for “partner” when the time comes for me for such forms. But “stepdad” works nicely, too. 🙂


  5. Hmmm. That is interesting. It’s been so long since I had to even worry about what to call a “boyfriend”, I almost forgot about that conundrum.


  6. I hate boyfriend. its so high school. my main squeeze? my lova? boytoy? I am so glad I don’t have to deal with those forms anymore!


  7. So I’m thinking Sex Slave wasn’t an option? Or how about “really good” friend of the family?


  8. Stepdad seems to fit, in spite of the formalities not being observed. J appears to be a very good dad for your girls.


  9. How about Man Servant?

    Lol, totally kidding.

    (I like the sound of it though…)


  10. LOL @ Single Mama NYC’s suggestion!

    Hey, thanks for the link on your post! Yeah, you know, I still don’t know what to call TF. And I *still* don’t know if he’ll ever refer to me as more than a friend or not (even though he snuggles me and lets me get cozy with him around his friends and roommates).

    If TF ever DOES refer to me as more than a friend? I think I’ll probably spit out my drink, look at him incredulously and then attack him later in private. Yep. Probably.


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